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Showing posts from October, 2022

"Karen" Ghost Haunts Local Pizzeria

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When Pete Zuhria opened Pete Zuhria's Pizzeria in Point Borough, he knew that there might be times he would have to deal with difficult customers, but he never thought he'd be haunted by one. The property was previously leased to Tom Aitopy who ran Tom Aitopy's Tomato Pies. It is believed that the ghost was once a customer of the former establishment. "I've got nothing against ghosts," said Zuhria, "The problem is that in life this ghost was a Karen." A "Karen" is a person who has an extreme sense of entitlement. Karens feel they deserve special treatment and become angered when they think they are being slighted, even when they aren't. It can be quite annoying to encounter a Karen in the wild. Zuhria says that his ghost Karen can be just as annoying. "We never know when the ghost will pop up, "said Zuhria. "I could be getting a pizza ready for someone and she's suddenly screaming, 'I said no pepperoni! Where'...

Brick Rejects Shake Shack, Approves Unique Chicken Eatery

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In what has become a common occurrence in Brick, a popular restaurant chain will not be opening. The zoning board rejected a proposal for a new Shake Shack franchise. However, this rejection opened the door for another restaurant. The board granted approval to Pickin' Chicken which hopes to open by December. Pickin' Chicken is the first restaurant chain in America to offer patrons live chickens. "It's kind of like the lobster tanks at seafood restaurants," said company spokesperson Tyson Broiler. "Just the way customers can choose their lobster while it's alive, our customers can choose their chicken from a special coop."  As Broiler explained, once the chicken is chosen, it is placed in a patented machine that gently kills the bird, plucks it clean, and delivers it to the chef for preparation. Their fast cook techniques mean that a chicken can go from coop to table in only 20 minutes. "I guarantee that we serve the freshest chicken anyone has ...

Local Medium to Appear on America's Next Top Psychic

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No one could have predicted it, but since it premiered on the History Channel two years ago, the show America's Next Top Psychic (ANTP) has become one of the network's most popular shows. The show is a contest that pits psychics against each other to determine who has the greatest psychic ability. The winner receives $100K and the title America's Top Psychic. This season, a local clairvoyant from Point Pleasant, Crystal Bawl, will be trying to earn that title. Crystal, whose professional name is Miss Fortune, is a natural for the show. For the past seven years she has been using her special abilities to help locals communicate with spirits and prepare for the future. She even helped the police solve a crime, although that was just because she reported seeing a car being stolen. Nonetheless, her supernatural gifts cannot be denied. "I knew that I would be chosen for the show," said Miss Fortune. "I am no stranger to seeing the future, ya know." She said t...

Recent Storms Bring Canal Surfing to Point Pleasant

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Minnie Simmons has been surfing the Jersey Shore since she was six. Now at the ripe old age of 27, she considers herself an old-timer. She is a respected member of the local surfing community with a unique distinction, "I'm one of the few people who has surfed the canal three times," she said. "A lot of board buckaroos think canal surfing is the ultimate ride of the Valkyries. It really is one of the best summer squashes you'll ever have." Simmons, who is also an expert in surfer slang, is considered the best canal surfer by her peers.  Only a few people have experienced "surfing the canal." Surfers already know that storms on the Atlantic can produce some gnarly waves, but locals occasionally see fast moving water pushed into the canal. "It's pretty awesome," said Simmons. "When you got a nature tantrum pushing the salty soup up the Point gap, you get a really rad ride." It's a special challenge to surf the canal. The c...