The Bay Head Beacon

In recent years, Jersey Shore beaches have been dealing with more and more unwanted visitors. These "troublemakers" will often swarm beaches and ruin the day for those hoping to enjoy a fun beach outing. Bay Head has decided to be proactive in dealing with this problem. This week the Bay Head Police announced the formation of their own SWAT Team. This special unit of six new highly trained officers will begin patrolling the beaches on July 2. The move is designed to provide a fun and safe experience for beachgoers. Sargeant Buzz Coleoptera leads the new SWAT team and says he and his officers are ready for whatever problems may arise. "We're all well trained and have the best equipment available. We are prepared with a combination of chemical deterrents and lethal tools. We can respond at a moment's notice to any situation that arises. Our first job is to try to isolate and contain any incursions on the beach. If things get out of control, though, we are prepared ...

For most families, Father's Day is a happy holiday where children get to show their appreciation for their male parent. Get-togethers and cook-outs are common ways families unite to celebrate the holiday. Usually, a father will be given gifts that reflect his interests and hobbies. It should be a pleasant day for everyone. But for one family, Father's Day has become an annual nightmare.  Macon Trubble says he doesn't mean to upset his family. "I don't see what the big deal is. I just don't like it when people make a big deal over me. Is that such a big deal?" "Dad always says it's not a big deal," says 18-year-old daughter Kelly, "but it is kind of a big deal. We never know what to buy for him. He doesn't fish. He doesn't play golf. He doesn't watch sports. He doesn't like restaurants, He doesn't wear ties to work, He hates get-togethers of any kind. He doesn't enjoy grilling. He doesn't even like cake! What a...

Good news for everyone who was upset about Corrado's being evicted from the Laurel Square Mall in Brick. Another store has already agreed to move in. A Foodtown Supermarket will be opening before the end of the summer. "What unbelievable good luck!" said spokesperson for Brick, Annie Daynow. "Foodtown was looking for a space to open in Brick, and now that Corrado's didn't work out, the perfect spot is available for them." Foodtown had once had a store in Brick located in a site unaffectionately referred to as the "old Foodtown lot" by locals. The store's return is an unexpected surprise. A representative for Foodtown, Will B. Seeinya, said the company is thrilled to be coming back. "This is a great opportunity to once again be part of a great community. We may not be Corrado's, but we are a great store looking forward to a great future in a great location." There are other retail changes happening in Brick. Aldi's will be ...

Corrado's supermarket made the sad announcement today that after zero years in business they will be closing their Brick store permanently. "It is with a heavy heart that I must tell you that after zero years in Brick, Corrado's has decided to close," said spokesperson Nevah Opennin.  "Years ago, when this store never opened, we knew that we had found a wonderful community that would never get to appreciate our unique Italian market," Opennin continued. "It is truly sad to be saying goodbye to the Shore area after never getting to know any of its great people. In the years we have not been open, you all never seemed like family." Local Corrado's enthusiast, Ima Stunned of Point Pleasant, couldn't believe the news. "I'm, uh, stunned," said Ima Stunned, struggling to find the right words. "Corrado's has meant so little to this community. They've always been my favorite store that never opened. My family is so upset ...

Corrado's, the popular Italian supermarket, recently announced that their new Brick store will be opening on the 4th of July. This was great news for everyone who has been waiting several years for the store to finally open. Visions of fresh eggplant, mozzarella, mortadella and other delicacies danced in everyone's head. At last, the shore area would be able to enjoy the Italian foods they have been craving since 2019. It was truly great news. Unfortunately, the era of good feelings did not last. Company spokesperson, Nevah Opennin, made the announcement today. "I know people will be disappointed, but our July 4 opening date was just too ambitious," she said. "Good things take time and we just don't want to rush. As upset as people might be with a delay, they would be even more upset if we opened a store that wasn't 100% perfect." Brick resident, Hope Izzfading, had a strong reaction when she heard the news. "Oh, c'mon!" she said. ...