Thanksgiving Turkey On the Run After Pardon Denied

Many years ago, one of the Presidents, maybe Truman or Kennedy, started pardoning Thanksgiving turkeys. These lucky birds would end up in a petting zoo or friendly farm instead of on a platter covered in gravy. Over the years, other local governments, including Point Pleasant Borough, have adopted the tradition. In a ceremony at city hall that kicks off the holiday season, the mayor pardons one bird that would otherwise get cooked and eaten. This year, things didn't go as planned.

"After careful consideration, the mayor and council have decided to deny a pardon to Tony the Turkey," said assistant to the mayor Holden DeLine. "Tony has been a particularly naughty turkey and does not deserve a pardon. Instead, a pardon will be granted to very well-behaved turkey named Kate." 

Somehow, Tony must have realized that his pardon would not be granted because early this morning he escaped. "When the time came for the turkey to be prepped for the Thanksgiving dinner, he was not in his cell," said DeLine. "Instead, a tofu turkey was found in Tony's pen. He also made an escape tunnel like something out of Shawshank."

Tony the Turkey is still on the loose. Anyone who spots the wayward Turkey is encouraged to contact Point Borough police immediately so they can pre-heat the oven.

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